Monday, November 5, 2007

Words To The Blind People of the City

Hello for Paris - the big sister city of Pittsburgh.

I am so excited about the election tomorrow. My brain is frothing.

The city must be so excited with Mr. Luke on the television in commercials, with signs for him everywhere, his picture posted on every light pole, spontantious parades where workers leave work and parade down streets with chants and songs about the great Mayor. Bars full of his supporters singing songs of his praises into the wee morning? Cars must be decorated with loudspeakers speaking his inspirational words. Have lines formed outside the voting houses already? The residents who are living in the city must have an excitement of a man overdosing on Viagra!?!?

And is the city ready for the aftermath? Will people flock the streets in excitement with news of the victory of Mr. Luke? Will buses be over turned? Will couches and trash cans burn? Will anybody sleep on Tuesday night? Will anyone work on Wednesday? Nothing says a true victory as a victory riot!

As I know from watching the city from a far for so long that there are blind people in the city. They are not so smart and they fail to see the greatness nor the vision of the Great Mayor Ravenstahl. I have learned in my life that there will always be stupid people. In this election we will be able to see how many stupid blind people live in the city by seeing how many people vote for DeSantis. This is a great opportunity to do a great IQ test on the city. After the election, we have to figure what to do rid the city of the stupid blind people. I recommend an educational camp somewhere far away like Butler County.

On the eve of a great day for the great city of Pittsburgh, I urge all you dim blind people to resist your urge to vote for DeSantis and vote for Mr. Ravenstahl and in you excitement victory riot, please burn a couch in my honor!!!