Thursday, January 31, 2008

The Quest For My Love?

Hello from the shining other Cultural Capital Paris!!

I give thanks to all for the support I am recieving in my quest. I with full truth feel I may be able to save your city. How may you explain that I have falling in love with a strange city on the other side of the world.

In Paris, we are use to visitors who come to our city who have dreams of making love to our city. Some since childhood have dreamed of a romantic city with such dreams of spring time in Paris or kissing under the Eiffel Tower. These images did not develop overnight. For centuries, we in France have cultivated such images like small plantings of flowers waiting for the blooming. Plus, we found long ago when searching for young women to make love to what better way to bring a weak kneed forgien girl with romantic dreams in her head right to you!!! They stay for a few days, fall in love, make love and then leave! We Parisians are not as dumb as you think. Have the mouse come to you, Cat!

I share this with you in Pittsburgh for hope that you can learn. Think of your visions of your city like a muscle. Exercise you visionary muscle every day!

Monday, January 28, 2008

My New Software Creation!

From Paris that has been upset by a young man ruining a bank!

This past weekend I made a software product to help with the removal of snow in my adoptable city of Pittsburgh. Being a technologist, this was very easy for myself.

If the city would like to see this, the can pay for my trip and I will buy a laptop and bring my software with me to show! If you wish to use my software product for the paving of streets or for the removing of trash, I can easily change the picture and some words and the system will be ready for that use too!

Here are some pictures. Click Pictures to see them correctly. It is very easy to use....

Pick your criteria for the streets demanding snow removal! Then hit the Go! button.

A detailed map is ready for the snow truck driver. In this example, is for the Mayor to get to work!

While I must be truthful and admit it does not work to the perfection I desire (currently it only works on Windows ME), with a contract and its purchase I can work out the problems and make it better than what the city currently possesses.

If you wish for a demostration in person, please e-mail me at pierre4pgh@gmailcom

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Urban Redistribution Authority

Today, I read this article in the Post Gagette. It made me so mad I could spit. Or cry. I'm not sure which. Strawberry way will probably be drowning her sorrows in IC Light and Cigarettes when she reads it. Poor Strawberry. I wanted to write about this immediately in hopes that Mayor Luke would be able to do something about it.

Basically, what they are saying is that our beloved URA (that's the Urban Redevelopment Authority) just sold the old downtown GC Murpphy builing for $2.3 million. And, that the sale price is LESS than what they paid for it! How stupid is this? An agency of our bankrupt city is buying buildings, then selling them for a loss? Actually, according to the article, the URA paid $6.28 million for the properties!! So, they have sold it for about 1/3 what they paid for it.

Well, I am going to rename the URA the Urban Retardation Authority! With no offense intended to people who are mentally retarded. They cannot help it because they are born that way. But, the URA is behaving like a bunch of retards, and they were not born that way, so they have no excuse.

The URA claims that, by selling the property at a significant loss, they are turning a bad situation around. Of course, it was a stupid lawyer who said that, so what do you expect? Basically, they are just selling the property to Millcraft Industries for a song. Speaking of songs, it's like they think they are taking a frown and turning it upside down! But they are not! This still really makes me frown!

This would be like if you bought a vacant old house in Lawrenceville for, let's say, $65,000. Then, you just sat on it for a couple of years, letting it get even more run down and then re-sold it to a couple of crack dealers for $22,000! Why would you be so stupid as to do this? And, what are those crack dealers going to do with the house? Probably turn it into some kind of crack whore house for all their friends. How can this be turning a bad situation around? It would be just like that damn casino/whorehouse Don Barden is building for his gambling buddies on the Northside. God only knows how much the URA is paying Barden to build that thing! Or, you know, Millcraft already built that fancy Steakhouse in the former (brand new) Lazarus building (which the City and the URA basically paid for in the first place, then gave to Millcraft). The Steakhouse is just a place for the rich Millcraft crack whore friends of Jack Piatt to hang out. No regular folks can afford to go there, so it might as well be a crack whore house, which regular god-fearing people also do not go to. We just want to be able to go to a nice Denny's or Eat 'n Park and get a happy meal after church like real people. Does the URA do anything to help make this possible for us? NO! I would also be a bit happier if the URA would give somebody money to build some decent gay bars, then just let us LesBiGays and our creative class friends fix up everything real nice. But they do not do that either! Nope, it's just fancy places for rich people. Geez, you'd think that the Republican Loser DeSantis was running this City instead of Luke. Well, I know Luke wants somewhere to go after Church, even if, as a Catholic, he is not a true Christian.

Anyway, what is happening is that the URA basically gave 4 million dollars of the taxpayers' hard-earned money to Millcraft industries to build another fancy "redevelopment." Way to go URA! I do not like this waste of money at all. I am just really upset about it and I am wondering if Mayor Luke knows about it? Surely he would not let this happen!

URA's Shameful $4 million giveaway to Millcraft leads me to my second new name for the URA: Urban Redistribution Authority (because they redistribute money to rich people).

I hope Mayor Luke can put a stop to this madness and waste of public money. I know he wants to. Luke, are you reading this?

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Many News That I Wish To Report And Make Commentary

From Paris Full of Love!

1) Man Goes To BasketBall Game:
I was reading about how Mr. Todd Reidbord left a meeting for the Planning Commission listening to angry people from the soon to be domed Hill District to have some relaxation by watching a BasketBall game. People from The Hill District are mad as they trend to be but also gangs of Pittsburgh Bloggers have their "female under clothing gathering tightly".
It is clear to me that Mr. Reidbord knew which way his vote was going to go when he first sat down in his chair. As the meeting went on for hours and hours beyond what we in France call a long work day beyond 5.5 hours, boredom must have settled into his body. If I were that man, it would be hard to keep my eyes from closing. I would be doing puzzles like Sudoku (which is taking France like a storm. Beware of this addictive puzzle drug Pittsburgh if you have not been captured by it already!!!!). But if I were a powerful visionary like Mr. Reidbold, I would be working on my next Big Project and I would be making drawings of massive buildings and drawing maps of the properties I would need and figuring the amount of money I would want from the city. Then if I knew the Mayor was at a BasketBall game and I could show him my plans, I would rush to the game arena to show my plans and hopefully even before the Kickoff of the BasketBall game, I would have another many million dollar deal done.
This is how true people of vision do their work. I know many of you who are common would not understand. Since you mostly work on base instinct like an animal, your not understanding turns to anger. People of vision understand this from you and expect this. They understand you think the game is checkers but they are really playing that 4th Dimensional Chess game that was often shown on Star Trek!!!

2) I Have A New Almost GirlFriend!!!
While she is not up to Lindsey Lohan, I have found Cat Call who seems smart and full of advice. I find the graphic on her website Cat Call does not reflect her well. The graphic makes her appear set for the cartoon SouthPark.

3) Is Mr. Ravenstahl To Surprise Me?
I have read that Mr. Ravenstahl is traveling to my village of Paris with his wife Erin. While I am surprised that he has not had a minion contact me, I have read this as clearly he will be surprising me!
While I know not his itinerary, I will be expecting a phone call or having him appear from nowhere to shake my hand. I will gladly give a tour of my grand city! I will surely remind him that Paris is a grand place to do what it takes to start a family! We as the French would be proud if the next generation of Ravenstahls begin in our fair city. Félicitations!!!!

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

My Parking Chair Update!!!!

So you might remember that my Parking Chair was stolen right around The Election? Well, the mystery has been solved sort of. I was walking my little dog Myron (named after MyronCope) around the block and it happened to be trash day. While little Myron was squatting making a BM I noticed my parking chair leg poking out of my neighbors black trash bag. I ripped the thing open and there it was with all my "Luke For Mayor" posters and everything. Someone had taken my nice cut out face of the Mayor and burned out his eyes with cigarettes and put devil horns on him and wrote the numbers 666 on his forehead.

The problem is the garbage pile is right between 2 houses so I can't tell who really took it. One house is my neighbor Helen who is a little old lady and the other one I think is a crack house full of kids that go to the culinary arts school. I figured its them because that is something they would do. I wasn't going to there door because who knows what they would do if I woke them up from their drug hangovers. You know they care knives!!!

So I went up to Helen's door and knocked. It took a long time but she finally answered the door. I asked her if she had taken my parking chair.

She said NO!

And then she went off saying things like I don't even have a car so why do I need to save a space. Then she called me mean. Then she reminded me that I had put stickers under peoples windshield wipers telling the to vote for The Mayor and it rained and then the neighbors had to scrape the stickers off.

She said that when she had a neighbor Christmas party where she invited all "the nice neighbors" (which it seems didn't include me) she said someone brought the chair over and put it her dinning room for the party and everyone started attacking it. Then she slammed the door.
I went and got my chair from the trash and put it right back where it had stood for 20 plus years. Now it looks awful. Before it was all rusty and ripped with some of the yellow foam showing on cushion but now it is all bent up and yucky.

I know in my heart I am not mean, and I am going to rely on my good Catholic upbringing and forgive her. I know I still have friends in the neighborhood like the retarded couple up the street and there are some other little old ladies who we've lived together for most of our lives and I've watched their children grow up and their husbands die.

The thing that brings me the most strength through this tough time is that I am the biggest supporter of The Mayor and I have his 311 number on speed dial. And I know if I have any problems I can just give him a call. Also, I run the BEST blog in Pittsburgh so I sit back and be happy about that.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Policy Paper!!!! Hill District

From the city where our country's President dates a most beautiful model - Paris!!!!

From my studies, I have a plan to propose for dealing with the Hill District that should make everyone on all sides of the fence be happy.

Let us take the Hill District and enclose it in a dome and make it into a shopping mall destination! Let us not forget to include a Steakhouse for this seems to be a sure sign of developmental success!!!

From my studies, the Hill District is not too large and engineers could surely enclose the whole area with a dome. I figure with all the steel that is in Pittsburgh and with some good students from the Carnegie Mellon, this should be easy.

Here are the benefits for the residents...
- They would have a grocery store that would be the Food Court of the Mall. They could easily pick food from many different vendors that represent the cuisines of the world. Chinese! American! Pretzel Shoppe!

- Living in a dome, they would not have to worry about weather. The dome would be climate controled so they would never have to shovel the snow again! Heating bills would be payed by the mall.

- They would work where they live. You would never have to leave the building to get to work. Some people would work for the stores in the mall but others could be historial recreator to show what the Hill District was like. I have heard of Williamsburg where revolotionary war time is recreated and people travel from around the world to experience the people in costumes. This would be a destination.

- It would be very secure. There would be only a few entrances so it would be easy to guard who is coming and going and the crime rate would go down. In case of crime all the doors could be locked, and the bad guys could easily easily be caught. In the United States, the only crime that happens at malls is usually some angry white man shooting people in a rampage so wouldn't that be an improvement over now?

Benefits to the city and to the Mayor and elected people...
- It would be an attraction. Who would not want to come to see a whole neighborhood in a dome? People would come to do the shopping. Families would come to see how the African Americans live. After a Penguins game at the new enclosed arena that will then again be enclosed, families could stroll in the middle of winter in their shorts because it will be so warm in the dome! As I undrstand a class of people called Mall Walkers - older people who enjoy walking in Malls will have the ultimate destination. 24 hours a day they could indulge in their harmless hobby in complete cliamte controled safety.

- The workforce for this giant endevour would be right there. You could easily follow the example of coal mining towns from the previous centery and charge rent and issue your own money to be used at the stores. The people could get loans of company money and before you know it, these people will become a permenent workforce that will be unable to leave. The dome maybe able to pay for itself just through this part of my policy!

- Everyone would be happy. As elected officials, you can use my plan right now to appease all the angry people. The plan has everything. It provides food and shelter as well as entertainment. Who could not be happy with that.

- The Dome could be a "green building" so you say you are saving the earth. Please look at the Biosphere 2 project -

So please take my plan and do what you will with it. I know there are some parts that have been worked out, but it seems to be ok to start on big projects without having everything figured out. For using my ideas, I do not require any payment or credit. I am just trying to make Pittsburgh the best adoptable city it can be.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

My Steeler National Update: The Shreds of My Heart

Paris, France which only exists on the world's other side

I experienced my first loss as a Steeler National on Sunday morning. I had gone the whole football year without viewing my beloved Steelers fail. As I sat in a Turkish cafe far from my home, I observed the end of the chapter of the book that has been My Football Year as a member of the Steelers Nation.

As I watched, my heart jumped up and floated and then crashed and shattered. It is truely like a love affair with a real woman. It is like a drive in through the Alps. It is pretty. There are ups and down and on occassion you get to drive through a dark tunnel.

I jumped up from chair at times and then others I fell to the floor with my head in my hands. The Turkish men who were smoking despite the limits on smoking inside may have believed I were strange but I had payed them for the privilage of the television for some time. I also payed them for the privilage to talk out loud. Then I had to pay them for the privilage to not ask me questions about American Football while I focused my entire being into the game. I did spend the time in the middle of the game to tell them about Pittsburgh. I do not believe I convinced them of the grandness of Pittsburgh. For future note, Turks do not know a droplet about the location of Pennsylvania!

Now I face a great emptyness with out my American Steelers Football. How do you cope in Pittsburgh? I feel the urge to drink more than usual. My chin feels heavy and is hard to keep in the air. My chin is always kissing my chest.

I try to see the swans through the bird shit. I have learned so much in these past few months. Just this last game I realized that Ben Rothlesburgher does not stay on the field all game. He takes time off and stands on the side of the field after he throws the ball to the people on the other team. I assume this is for punishment.

So now I close the book after reading the final chapter of my book of my first experience with the Steelers Nation. I look forward to the next session like a fish swimming back to its spawning ground. Like a bird that must fly away for the winter knowing I will be back after the weather turns.

Thank you Dr. Tomlin for the great sessions this year and may you heal all the warriors for the fight that is next football session!

Monday, January 7, 2008

Now The Downfall of Pittsburgh is Soon

I was sooooo mad earlier today when it came out that Motznik wasn't voted President and that the Pedutohead is going to be in charge of The Finance committee I actually broke my big green ashtray that I have been throwing at the wall whenever I was angry since my kids were little. Today it finally broke. If anyone knows where I can get another ashtray, let me know. I found a picture of what it looked like...

After I calmed down and cryed a little, I started feeling sorry for Mr. Motznik. He was so close and he has tried so many times to become Presient of Council. My granddaughter Tiffany said I could send something called an e-card. I found some nice ones here that I thought might cheer him up I think the one that says "A brighter day is just around the corner" is soooo cute and I think it would cheer him up.

The problem is, I can't find his email address anywhere. Maybe someone could send him that card from me or send me his email address, that would be great.

Shields wins Council Presidency

We are doomed.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

It Is So Clear That Jim Motznik Should Be President of City Council (eventhough preseident of the United States wont be bad)

I know today is a Steelers Day and I usually don't Blog but I have something to say...

I've been hearing that on Monday, City Council is going to be voting for a new City Council President. We all know after what happened with Bob O'Connor (God rest his soul) and then Luke became Mayor because he was Council President. For the last year, I have been so worried that nothing happens to The Mayor because I kept thinking look who would become Mayor - Doug Shields!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now that there is going to be a vote on Monday, maybe we can put someone in there who everyone would like as Mayor - Jim Motznik!!!!!!!!!!!!

We all know from his past record that he would do exactly what Luke would do because he has done everything that Luke has wanted him to do. Who knows The Mayor's agenda better than him! If Motznik were it, it would make The Mayor's life so much easier. Get around all that City Council stuff with that "we are trying to represent people" when all they want to do is just be mean. What we need is a City Council that will just let stuff that The Mayor wants to happen happen.

Mr. Motznik is the best choice because he has been around a while and he knows how the city works and he is mean enough that he'll make all the poop heads on council do what he wants. I'll feel sorry (not!) for the big Pedutohead when Motznik is in charge. The first thing Mr. Motznik should do is make Pedutohead only have a crayon and coloring book at his desk during council meetings and maybe a sippy cup.

The big test is going to be the new people who are coming to council. There is the doctor teacher, the gay guy and the black church guy. I can't remember there names yet, but hopefully people have already talked to them and they are going to vote the right way - for The Mayor. This is going to be the big test to see if they are poopheads or not!!!

Remember readers, Doug Shields represents Squirrel Hill and remember who they voted for Mayor - RESANTIS! So remember they hate Pittsburgh. Doug Shields hates Pittsburgh. Let's see if the new Council people hate Pittsburgh too!!! I hope not. I pray they don't!!!

Thursday, January 3, 2008


I opened my paper this morning and I spit my coffee all over my carpet. It is a good thing my carpet is a nice dark green so it doesn't show stains to good. Right there on the cover was a picture of Danny O kissing his family and a hole story about him getting sworn in. Where was my invitation?

Here I am, the first blog to endorse Mr. Onorato for Governer( which he never aknowleged and I took back). Then he has his big party, and I hear nothing about it. Can't he remember the little people who got him to where he his? Here I am an old lady writing a Blog but I must have got him at least 5 votes plus my own!!!! And he just blows me off.

This is hard for me, but I am taking my endorsement back even further. Imagine I took it back but now I've taken it twice as far back. It is going to take a lot for him to get back to the even. Don't pass Go and don't get $200!!! Go straight to jail!

I was pretty angry about the whole drink tax thing not that it would effect me. I hardly never go out and drink. I stay at home, but I just keep thinking about the children. Here we are always talking about the young people in Pittsburgh and keeping them around, but Here comes mister big pant Danny Boy who taxes there drinks. The kids are just like the senior citizens. They don't have big wallets to afford their drinks. If we wanted to keep young people around, WE"D MAKE THE DRINKING CHEAPER!!!!

I don't blame the young people for wanting to move to Cranberry or Butler County.

This is going to be hard for me, but I have a Dan Onorato T-shirt I have been saving from the first time he was elected head of the county (he was the first Democratic County Executive! so I figure it was historic. It is a white shirt with his blue and black logo. I have hardly worn it except a few times as a night shirt). I'm going to give my shirt away. The first person who e-mails me at and asks for the shirt gets it FOR FREE!

In other news, I saw that some Upper St Clair county council guy put in a bill saying that the Homestead exemption should be raised to $25,000. My house is appraised at $11,000. Does that mean I'm going to be getting like 14,000? If that is so, I am so happy. Dan you better pass that bill because that is the type of property tax relief I'm looking for!!!! With that kind of money, I'd buy every young person in Allegheny County a drink. There are about 100 young people left so it wont be that expensive.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

The Grandest of New Years to All

The year of the past 2007 was a formable of my life. I found the fair city of Pittsburgh thank you to the Internet and was slowly seduced. Now I am in a full love affair with a city on the other side of the world.
If I am allowed to compare Pittsburgh to a woman, I would say it has been like finding a young woman in a corner of library of books. Though she is not of the make of a super model, I sense something special. I walk close to the table where she is studying. Here hair is up like a librarian. I sit down to talk to her and she is very friendly. I notice she is not reading the most literary of books maybe something like a book of self help for her low esteem. I tell her she needs to put her chin in the air and to stop feeling like the runt of the litter of calves. Then I sing her a song....

Hey there, Georgy girl
Swingin down the street so fancy-free
Nobody you meet could ever see the loneliness there....
inside you...

Hey there, Georgy girl
Why do all the boys just pass you by?
Could it be you just don't try or is it the clothes you wear?
You're always window shopping but never stopping to buy
So shed those dowdy feathers and fly....
a little bit...

Hey there, Georgy girl
Theres another Georgy deep inside
Bring out all the love you hide
and, oh, what a change thered be
The world would see a new Georgy girl

Hey there, Georgy girl
Dreamin of the someone you could be
Life is a reality, you can't always run away
Dont be so scared of changing and rearranging yourself
It's time for jumping down from the shelf....
a little bit....

Hey there, Georgy girl
There's another Georgy deep inside
Bring out all the love you hide and, oh, what a change thered be
The world would see a new Georgy girl...
Wake up, Georgy girl
Come on, Georgy girl

At this point she absorbs the wisdom I am giving. She let's down her hair and takes off her stuffy sweater. She becomes Lindsey Lohan!

She shines with a brillience that she has she never thought she had inside. She becomes the most beautiful of the whole world.

My goal for 2008 is to make Pittsburgh into Linsey Lohan. Pittsburgh, I hope you listen to my wisdom or else you are doomed to becoming an old maid! Remember there are people who want you to stay ugly so they can feel better than you. You must destroy them.

Also as a goal for 2008, I hope to make my virgin trip to Pittsburgh. You must become the Lindsey Lohan before then or you will make me very sad. It will cost me much money to make my journey unless I find someone from Pittsburgh who will see the value of me visiting and will pay my journey and expenses. I have recieved offers from Nigeria to help me pay but I do not need to also have the Nigeria kings hidden fortune as well. I prefer my simple life. I would hope for a powerful Pittsburgher of passion and vision to step up and say, "Pierre, we are the Lindsey Lohan and we wish for you to come to us and make love." I believe all possibilities are possible.